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Matt Ridley Counselling Service MBACP. Exeter, Devon
2nd Floor, 23 Southernhay East, Exeter, Devon, EX1 1QL
Couples
Counselling
I offer couples counselling to help give you the space to work through relationship difficulties.
Communication breakdown - Arguments -Lack of intimacy - Anger - Emotional detachment - Infidelity - Mistrust
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Any of these sound familiar?
Couples counselling differs to individual counselling because the main focus of the work is on the relationship that is co-created by both partners. It's not uncommon to develop unhelpful communication styles, as well as behaviours but end up damaging the fabric of the relationship. Once these patterns are well established and have become normal, it can be very difficult to be aware of them, and even harder to change them without help.
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“We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them”
― Albert Einstein
It's not my job to place blame or responsibility on one person in the relationship, and I believe there is a shared responsibility by both partners to bring about positive change.
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You must both be equally committed to the process for it to be successful.
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Our relationship with our partner is often one of the most important things in our lives. Working on and maintaining a healthy relationship takes time, work and dedication, but hopefully very worthwhile.
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male, couples, counselling, couples counsellor, couples counselling, relationship therapy, therapy, marriage, guidance, exeter
Evidence based
I use a research-based approach to inform my work.
Experienced & Qualified
I am appropriately qualified and have over 10 years of experience.
How couples counselling works
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As a couples counsellor, I will first spend some time making an assessment of your relationship and will be looking for the areas that need the most work. These can include, but are not limited to:
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General communication style
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Individual history and its impact on the present
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Trust and commitment
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Handling conflict
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Your friendship with one another
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Larger influences from family
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Differences in religious or spiritual views
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From here I will use my expertise to help you to develop a more loving, trusting, and meaningful relationship using various techniques, exercises and giving lots of practice talking to one another. Male couples counsellor
I have training from The Gottman Institute and use some of their evidence-based methods when working with couples, one of which is The Four Horsemen. This involves identifying and then working with:
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Criticism - Contempt - Defensiveness - Stonewalling
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Each of these areas can be insidious in relationship and are vital to work through to deepen harmony, respect, and love. Here is a short video explaining more:
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How long will it take?
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This will vary from couple to couple depending on the issues you face. I will be able to give more of an idea after an in-person assessment.
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What are the limitations?
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I will only work with couples that are both absolutely willing to work together and commit to the process.
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I will not work with couples if certain forms of domestic violence are happening within the relationship.
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I will not be able to work with couple if there is an affair currently taking place.
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